Picking back where I left off I began to fall out of love for New York and set my sights on different territory. Philadelphia...city of brotherly love and where my favorite film series "Rocky" takes place. That part is for another post.
I had been to Philadelphia a few times before with my friends Tiffany, Cheryl and Devin but I began to fall in love with the city not only for its rich history and amazing food but also for the chill atmosphere and friendly people it holds within. Now before I move on, I know there is some rough parts of Philadelphia because I dated someone from the hood.... but thats another post as well. But if you really look beyond the ruggedness and faded buildings you will find true beauty within. A sense of love for a city that has been through so much. Kinda like me. I began to fall in love with the city because of a popular bar called "Woodys" It is still and will always be my favorite gay bar because of the variety of people and music it entails. Everyone that I have ever met in that bar I still keep in contact with today. Downstairs is where you pregame, and upstairs is where you can rave to some techno music or shake your ass to some good hip hop music. I was always in the hip-hop room.
Now... your probably wondering what does this have to do with me wearing my uniform with gay society... Well, people in Philadelphia were more about me personally than about my uniform. After about a year of not telling anyone I was in the military I finally would just tell people the truth and go from there. Most people treated me like normal person but occasionally asked about my job.. if I fly planes again or if I had ever been deployed. Both are still "no" to this day... But most importantly, for once in my life.. I felt accepted in a city, in a bar, in a group of amazing people and I truly felt complete. Yes, there are some amazing bars in New York but most people go there with groups of friends and stay within there own. You try to start a conversation with someone and they briefly say "hi" and eventually you can tell they were trying to leave or go back to their friends.
Thankfully thats not what happened to me on Staten Island when I arrived in February 2012 but when in the city itself. I felt like an outsider. Most people don't realize this but its hard moving all over the place and having to start over. It truly gets lonely and secluded. Thankfully I am very social but there are others that are not so much and have a hard time adjusting to the moving but also talking to strangers. Other military LGBT members will know what this is like. Even straight military members. But its harder for me as a gay man to find acceptance within society because of growing up in the South, but also because of what I was called all throughout my childhood and even sometimes into adulthood. Its also hard for me to show PDA because of what people might say or throw at me... Yes... I have had rocks thrown at me before. It just goes to show that we as a whole nation are still not up to the same ideology as others but we keep pushing along despite fighting for their freedom and a common cause.
I ask everyone that reads this to next time go up to someone who is alone at the bar or is standing the corner all by themselves. Because they might just be like people I was talking about above; shy, lonely, trapped within. You might just make a difference in their day, their night, their week, or even their life. You never know....
To end this I will say this to all who read this blog; and please feel free to comment. I love to hear about other people...
I am proud of what I do everyday. Every morning I wake up at 545...well not every morning but you get the point. I wake up and put on a uniform that means more to me than you can possibly imagine. It represents me. It represents my other Air Force counterparts. It represents the United States. But it also represents Freedom. The very Freedom that allows you all to read my story and see what life is really like as a gay man serving in the United States Air Force. So the next time you are at a bar or out in public and you find that and individual is a member of the LGBT community and they are in the military, I ask that you do not look at them any different. I ask that you do not see them as a checkbox on your bucket list. I ask that you do not see them as a fantasy for one night. I ask that you please talk to them and get to know them with open arms and on a personal level. You might just change their life.....
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